Thursday, December 28, 2017

Throwback Thursday...I can't believe I am posting these

I truly believe to grow you have to be honest.  Honesty, especially with yourself is the only way to grow and look back with true perspective. 
One of the things that bothers me the most is when people say...
"well it's easy for you" 
WHAT?!
Nope.  Not easy, never was.  The one thing I think I do have going for me is 
I am now able to (I struggled badly with this at one point) be honest with myself, 
let things out instead of keep them in (hence the blog)
think, 
set goals, 
and most importantly I have the mindset that I can figure out what I need to make those goals.  

Here are the good pictures.  I didn't photograph myself often when I was at my heaviest.  These are the ones I could find after I started trying to get back on track.  
The highest size I got up to was a 16.  
I weighed 165.  
I was 5 feet tall.  
I just didn't feel great health wise. 




See  you tomorrow.  
If you're visiting...say hello! 
Heck...I left you pictures. 
AJ

Wednesday, December 27, 2017

Get Dressed- We're Going to the Gym

So we all have off for the winter holidays.  Fun, right?  Well not if things don't go as planned...and heck lets be honest they never do.  I currently have the girl child at Gymnastics and the boy child is riding around with his roller blades and helmet while also trying to play the piano.  😳 
I am trying to get time in to make the goals I set out for myself.  
Goals: 
1.  Do something physical each day.  
I am being very careful to not say workout every day.  This is one of the things that I would like to adjust after burning out in the past. Too much...tends to be my thang.  Its a bit addicting that runners high, working out etc.  But I need to learn that balance is best.  I think working out HARD every day is too much on the body. So for now lets go with something Physical.  
Let's get physical, physical...
Image result for let's get physical
I digress...

2.  Blog each day.  
What helped me get back on track was going back to my roots and looking at the blog posts I have written in the past.  I seriously can't believe where I have been.  That's how lost you can get sometimes...that the person that did all of these things seems like a different person.  I needed to remind myself that this was ME.  That I did all of these things...and I can do it again but even better in the way that I feel like now I am even more aware of the process and wouldn't take advantage of it as much. 

3.  Food
I do know what to do with food.  I will get more into that later on.  I will tell you that at one point I was 50 pounds overweight and about 10 sizes bigger than I am right now. So I know food.  I know how to do good by it and I know how to abuse it.  I know what it is to be super strict and I know what it feels like to go crazy and do whatever the F&*% you want.  
(my kid don't like when I curse)
Both have positives, both have negatives. Right now what I am doing is sticking with making good choices.  I am not logging anything, counting, or abstaining from sweets.  This will obviously change once I get more on track.  Why?  
Because I just feel so much better when I am not swollen, hiving, moody and lethargic.  Let's be honest...sugars and junk do that to you.  End of story.  It sucks to have to stop them but the reward is a healthier life.


That's it for now.  Remember if you want to enjoy some sweet treats while we still can- enter a comment or say hello.  Some Hershey treats on your way if you win!  


Tuesday, December 26, 2017

How about 3 Strikes and I'm out...and a Hershey Giveaway

So last January I thought I was ready to get back. I had great intentions but didn't realize I needed to take many more twists and turns in this journey before even starting to think I could possibly get back. 

My mom passed away.  It will be 2 years April 26th.  To say it shook my world is an understatement.  Looking back over the past year and a half...I see that I was making it by the skin of my teeth.  Trying to get by, making it work for my kids.  I needed to lose myself to get by.  Goals, commitments, working out ...they all take the mind. They take focus.  They take determination. All things that I let go when my mom passed.  It seems now that I needed to let those go for a while.  I needed to focus on my inner self in a way that was very different.  Almost like I was protecting myself, putting myself into a sort of hibernation, forcing myself to do nothing but accept things, deal with things, be angry, be sad and just...be. 

There are spurts of light during all of this that allow you to see the things that mean the most.  The things that make you happiest.  Accepting that it will take time and patience and dedication to get back to those things is difficult.  Its a process that I am realizing now brings so much more of an understanding of what life is all about.

I want to get back on track.
I want to be feel free again. 
I want to run and feel strength. 
I want to be healthy for myself.
I want to be healthy for my children. 
I want to be the light that I was able to see in all of the darkness....

Today I will try again because that's what we do.  When we get knocked down, we get up and we try again. 

My goals I will touch upon in later posts but they all revolve around:
*Health * Excercise  *Meditation/Yoga   *Academics/Courses/New Learning
So today I struggled with getting to the gym because my little bugger aka Lucas was too scared to be left with his sister.  So I went in the basement and used some of my favorite Instagram People.  I am going to link the workouts.  They are awesome and quick and you can use them anywhere! Good luck and let me know if you try them!

Workout: 
Basement- 45 minutes.
1/2 mile Sprints on the treadmill

LEGS- I did 2 rounds of 10 each exercise

CORE WORKOUT - 2 rounds @10 Each

ARMS- 2 Rounds @ 10 each

Definitely got my heart rate up.  Try it out! 

Food
...we 'll talk after the holidays.  This mom has realized balance is best and never start off expecting perfection.  Today I only had 10 Hershey Kisses lol...


                                                   Image result for eating hershey kisses meme

                                                                                                        ...tomorrow is a new day. 

Agh for the heck of it...I'll share some! 
Leave a comment and say and I will do a free Hershey Kiss Bag Give Away!
(I'm pretty positive no one reads this and I will be eating the bag myself...again!)







Saturday, January 21, 2017

I'm Back-And Worse Off Than Ever

I know...its not the title that will bring a lot of readers...but that's not why I am back to blogging.  So much has happened in my life these past four years that I have lost a bit of who I am.  It's funny how life works.  Sometimes you feel like you know yourself so well...and then bang!  You lose yourself, you derail...in that derailment though there is a time when you need to look back and decide....which parts helped me, which parts hurt me, what do I want to get back, what do I want to continue and what do I want to do new.

I stopped running for a long spurt, a long spurt being 1-2 years.  When I say stopped...I mean I stopped the continuous daily run, the commitment.  I started to lift weights along with some spur of the moment 3 milers and an occasional yoga class.  There are many reasons why but I will save that for later....what's most important is that I stopped and I wondered a lot...which person is really me?  Am I the runner?  The person with goals?
                          OR...
Am I a person that likes the gym better, with a set routine, occasional runs on the treadmill?
                          OR...
Am I the person that does whatever I want, eats whatever I want, and then rushes around like a bat out of hell when I notice I am not fitting into most things in my closet, I am not truly happy with how I feel.

I am just at a point where I feel like--okay. Let's decide.  I love the FEEL of coming back from a run, I love the EMPOWERMENT I feel when I can pick up speed and run fast, I love being FREE when I am out in the open air, I pretty much love everything about it...which is why I get so confused to why I stopped?

Which is why I am writing.  I am writing to let myself feel and hear my own thoughts as I try to recover from some of the hardest years of my life...I am writing to help guide myself through this journey of getting back on track when you fall off.  I'm writing to help myself get back up and start off in the right direction.

I'll start slow.  I promise to myself to treat myself fairly....to enjoy the miles because the miles give me peace, they give me comfort and they bring me to my happy place.

Yesterday I ran 1 mile.  Today I ran three.

The journey back on track begins.





Monday, August 26, 2013

An Inspiring Human Being, Teacher and Father


If we could all learn something from Mr. Wright 
and put a touch of it into our teaching, our life, our parenting...








Friday, August 23, 2013

Epic Fail

Really?  How many times is that justifiably allowed to be a post title?  The thing I hate about epic fails is setting out to do something and not completing it...the point when you realize you have to ask yourself mid-run, and wonder (yes, right there in the middle of the road)

What is happening? What's going on here? 
 
Through these years of running, I have learned that some of those mid-run stops need to continue , because its your mind playing Battleship with you...and then sometimes you have to realize that you made shitty choices and the best thing is to go home.  I've been schooled by my body more than once and lets not get into that crazy mind of mine.....
 
When training for a marathon it becomes pretty apparent that your long runs especially past mile 13 start the day before your actual run...maybe even sooner actually.  You need your rest, you have to fuel correctly, you need to have the correct amount of allotted time that kids are accounted with ample time to fuel afterwards so you can recover.  I'm usually very good at this and if last weekends long runs wasn't one of my best runs...I would have probably would have cried out on that road today because when you mess up a long run and all the training guides are telling you..."your long run is the staple of your marathon-train like its race day..." yada, yada...you get the gist of it
 
Let me make this quick: 
*Yesterday I had a class from 9-2 came home and felt like I was thoroughly depleted in something... I raided the fridge and ate what my body wanted.  After that I fell asleep for 2 hours.  Now mind you I have two kids so it was a
"lets make believe mommy is the baby and you guys put me to sleep..."
and then when that one dies out
" lets make believe that you guys are the doctors and mommy's in the hospital lol"
....okay don't call CPS yet...what I'm trying to get across to you is it was one of those mommy naps...the ones where you wish to god you really could totally pass out, mouth open, waking up feeling refreshed.  Yeah, that wasn't what it was. 
 
*My husband gets home and as soon as he does I really pass out and go to sleep until he continues to tap me in a very annoying manner...  Who taps a sleeping mom?  No one should....no one.  
 
*I eat dinner and realize my  6 miler is not getting done.
 
*Go upstairs realize my "Aunt" that visits every month (kind of like a tapping husband) has paid me a visit ...ahhh okay the eating of the fridge and passing out from exhaustion. 
 
*I still await the final decision of are we going away or not because I need to know when to schedule my long run (my mistake number 1)
 
*Decide last minute to just do it the morning. 
 
*I would have to wake at 5 (which I didn't) 5:30 and then run a decent pace (which I couldn't --my darn AUNT!) 
 
* I started the run and at mile five realized I needed to make a decision.  Do I make this the six and do the long run the right way?  Or do I do mind over matter and push through and hope I make it in time?    I learned from a good trainer that "hope is not a strategy" and decided that it means to much to me to not allow myself to make the mistake. I swallowed my pride and headed home with a six miler and a lesson. 
 
***You can't rush these things.  Whether you are just starting out or if you are training for a marathon or more. 
 
***You need to listen to your body.  I'm getting better at this...not 100% yet.
 
***Appreciate the long run.  It can be such a beautiful time and peaceful and energizing...Fitting it in just doesn't match up.
 
***Getting down on yourself just takes up time that you could be using to figuring out how you are going to make it work...don't waste your time.  Its too valuable.
 
 
Do you listen to the warning signs or do you find yourself making the choice on the road? 
Do you hate when your Aunt comes to visit? Are your runs easier or harder during that time?
What helps you get over an epic fail?
 

 

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

When the Going Gets Tired...

When the Going Gets Tired....I sometimes head to the treadmill.  Today I was supposed to do an interval run.  I got to bed late the night before, woke up a bit tired, went downstais, made my usual run breakfast and then laced up.  As soon as I opened the front door I knew that it would be in my best interest to head to the gym rather than the track.  Track workouts have never been my favorites but I have learned that they are or shall I say can be, confidence boosters.  The problem is when and if you head to a track workout with your mind or your body lacking the enthusiam...it can deflate your little esteem balloon pretty darn fast. 

I have taught myself to embrace that little dreadmill.  It gives me the opportunity to not give up on what I set out to do for the day but at the same time allows me not to really have to think. 

The session was difficult but I was pleased at the end.  I made up my own little Ladder Interval workout (or at least I like to think I made it up...but I'm sure its a real thing made up by someone previously lol).  I've learned to run a bit faster (and by no means am I fast...some of you may think these treadmills times are chump change!) you have to ...practice running faster.

I warmed up at 6.0 for one mile
then for .25 I increased the interval speed by .2mph each .25 miles

.25-   6.6  (This is the speed I try to stay in most of the time)
.25-   6.8
.25-   7.0
.25-   7.2

50 second rest

.25-   6.8  (Totally sweating now)
.25-   7.0
.25-   7.2
.25-   7.4

50 second rest

25-    7.0   (These are the speeds I would love to be able to handle for a longer period of time)
.25-   7.2
.25-   7.4
.25-   7.6


This workout also helps relieve the boredom that can sometimes set in while at the gym.  I remember having to do a 12 mile run on a treadmill one time...I found myself counting other peoples reps in the gym or trying to guess what machine would be choosing next...um really?  With these types of treadmill runs you are too focused on trying to keep form at that pace, pressing the buttons every .25 of a mile and then hopping off for a 50 second break....the time goes by much faster.   

What do you do on the treadmill?  What's the longest you've run on a treadmill?  What do you do when are just not feeling the run or activity you are supposed to do?

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